CoDA Weekly Reading

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Each week, subscribers will automatically receive an email with a new "recovery reading". Hopefully, viewing this member created work will provide subscribers with thoughts to reflect upon during the remainder of the week.

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Archived Messages

 

CoDA Weekly Reading 01/14/20

January 14th 2020

B-O-U-N-D-A-R-I-E-S Being raised very strictly as a Southern Baptist military brat, my boundaries were set for me. They were cut and dried, and to cross one meant extreme punishment. Eventually even respecting these unreasonable and inconsistent boundaries led to excessive beatings, so the lines became obscured and life became even more stressful. I have never known how to have or respect boundaries for myself or others. The only boundaries I've ever experienced were built upon fear of consequences. Since I have been ...Continue Reading

CoDA Weekly Reading 01/07/20

January 7th 2020

The Secret Attic Throughout my life prior to CoDA I had a recurring nightmare where I was shocked to discover a hidden part of my house: a walled-off attic. This attic was so dilapidated that it threatened to destroy everything beneath it. Although I intellectually understood the dream's symbolism, it wasn't until my wife was in the Intensive Care Unit dying from alcoholism that the reality of this nightmare finally hit home. Due to workaholism, my codependent pattern of "walling off" and my enabling of her ...Continue Reading

CoDA Weekly Reading 01/02/20

January 2nd 2020

Fear has robbed me of fifty-three years. In the past, whenever bad things happened I developed coping mechanisms such as aloofness, isolation, astral and out of body travel, sarcasm and self-inflicted pain as ways to have control in my life. I honed these survival tools into strong weapons that I used on myself or anyone else who was a threat to my safety or wellbeing. They served me well in my teens and twenties but have become the very things that are preventing me from fully embracing life or myself. You ask me who ...Continue Reading

CoDA Weekly Reading 12/24/19

December 23rd 2019

In the past few days, I have had a number of women ask me why I have shaved my head. They have told me that they liked it or that they didn't like it; I actually don't care whether they like my shaved head or not. After a lifetime of very long hair, 'my glory,” and long, shapeless dresses and skirts (because wearing jeans was 'cross-dressing') it is a relief to be who I am: gay, codependent, old, woman, self-partnered. It is a relief to not be called a “witch”, “unsubmissive”, “out-of-order”, “rebellious”, “demonized ...Continue Reading

CoDA Weekly Reading 12/17/19

December 17th 2019

But....I Joined CoDA To Stop Myself From Doing Too Much! (Excerpted From A Longer Article) I believe this issue is one of the reasons we've had so much trouble attracting new intergroup members. First, we do not encourage new comers to CoDA to join intergroup, there is much service to be done at the meeting level! But once one has 6 months - 1 year (depending on the person) service on a larger scale can be a wonderful opportunity to grow in CoDA. I've personally found doing service to be a great way to learn to set b ...Continue Reading

CoDA Weekly Reading 12/10/19

December 10th 2019

WOW did I get some “hands-on” recovery at the airport after leaving the CoDA Convention! I made it through the airport fine UNTIL the TSA x-ray scanner detected something in my back pocket. I took out the paper and threw it out. TSA MASSAGE The TSA Agent informed me that he would need to inspect me physically. Normally I’m okay with a “TSA massage” when it’s my shoulders and back, but when he informed he was going to be patting down my buttocks and GROIN I felt UNCOMFORTABLE, but instead of being quiet and co-depe ...Continue Reading

CoDA Weekly Reading 12/03/19

December 3rd 2019

I took the dog out to relieve himself before bed and while gazing up at the clouds in the night sky I could see the moon behind them struggling to peek out. Staring at the beauty of it, I stood motionless with my flashlight in hand thinking about how I was like that moon struggling to shine above my spiritual stagnation and move towards higher transformative vibrations. All my life I have been like that struggling moon, enduring clouded visions and unrealistic expectations. What I see is just my perception of reality. ...Continue Reading

CoDA Weekly Reading 11/26/19

November 26th 2019

A week after our one-year anniversary, my boyfriend told me about his porn addiction. It was definitely a shock, and I was angry at him that he kept it from me for so long and angry at myself that I didn't see the signs. My mom was a recovering alcoholic, my sister a recovering drug addict, and my brother a suspected alcoholic. And with all this family history, I should have seen the signs, or so I thought. And I also thought I knew how to deal with this new information. I mean, my family dealt with it, so shouldn't I ...Continue Reading

CoDA Weekly Reading 11/26/19

November 26th 2019

A week after our one-year anniversary, my boyfriend told me about his porn addiction. It was definitely a shock, and I was angry at him that he kept it from me for so long and angry at myself that I didn't see the signs. My mom was a recovering alcoholic, my sister a recovering drug addict, and my brother a suspected alcoholic. And with all this family history, I should have seen the signs, or so I thought. And I also thought I knew how to deal with this new information. I mean, my family dealt with it, so shouldn't I ...Continue Reading

CoDA Weekly Reading 11/19/19

November 19th 2019

Hi, my name is C. I’m sorry to say that I am responsible for hurting a member of this group, and I am deeply sorry I did that. My behavior has caused damage to our relationship. It will probably take good deal of time before this person would see me as someone she can count on, and that is a loss I can’t recover. In the past, I have been so sure of who I am, and who I am not. This assurance comes from my beliefs. I believe that if I say I am going to do something, then I need to follow through and do it. If I say I a ...Continue Reading

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