CoDA's 12 Traditions: Tradition #3

From: "CoDA Announcements" <>
Subject: CoDA's 12 Traditions: Tradition #3
Date: August 17th 2018

This is the 3rd in a series of excerpts from the CoDA Workbook. We are in process of sending you 1 tradition each week for a total of 12 weeks.

Previous mailings can be found here: You may want to enter "traditions" in the search box.

The traditions are the foundation of our program & of our yearly Service Conference.

Please note that all material below this paragraph is taken directly from the CoDA Workbook & is Conference approved. While we are sharing it with the fellowship in the spirit of recovery and service, the copyright to this material is fully owned by Codependents Anonymous, inc (2013).

Tradition #3: The only requirement for membership in CoDA is a desire for healthy and loving relationships.

The program of Co-Dependents Anonymous is open to anyone with a desire for healthy and loving relationships. Because it is so broad in definition, Tradition Three allows each of us to belong. It helps us to stay out of our judgments about who should and should not attend meetings. We cannot touch, see, or prove whether anyone else has the desire referred to in this Tradition. It does not matter how we look or what we believe, whether we are young or old, what color we are, our religion, or socioeconomic class. ...... This Tradition can help us acknowledge that each of us is deserving of recovery.

..... Tradition Three frees us from having to work through our issues, or determine if we are codependent, before beginning our program of recovery. Even if we believe our codependency is our fault, even if we are in complete denial, we can still come to meetings.

..... Before recovery, we lived life according to what others wanted in a relationship. By placing our desire for a healthy relationship with ourselves first, we are learning a new way of life. When we love and honor ourselves, we have healthier relationships with others. A loving relationship includes honesty, openness, willingness, acceptance, and taking care of ourselves so that we can go freely to others. We learn to release the need to be filled from the outside, learning instead to be filled from within, before coming into relationship with another. Loyalty to ourselves needs always to come first.

..... We can release our desire to manipulate others. We learn to speak our truth appropriately, and to respect and listen to others.



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Per the 2nd tradition, For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority, a loving higher power as expressed to our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern. Developing a group conscience requires an informed fellowship, & to be effective trusted servants those you've elected must know the group conscience of the fellowship.

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