CoDA Weekly Reading 4/6/21

 
From: "CoDA Weekly Reading" <co-nnectionreadings@codependents.org>
Subject: CoDA Weekly Reading 4/6/21
Date: April 6th 2021

‘I Always Thought Codependency Only Had to Do with Romantic Relationships’

I always thought codependency only had to do with romantic relationships, and since I didn’t have issues in that area, I didn’t think it applied to me. However, when I learned codependency can show up in any relationship, I soon realized I had been living my life in a way that was making me miserable and was starting to destroy my relationships with family members.

To put it simply, I was becoming more and more obsessed with my mother.

I wanted to control everything about her. She could do nothing right in my eyes. I spent hours obsessively judging her in my head. Then I would criticize her openly, offer unsolicited advice, and/or act passive-aggressively towards her whenever I saw her or spoke to her.

I was also starting to try to control my oldest son in obsessive ways. I knew what I was doing was wrong. I would tell myself over and over to just quit thinking about my mom- to just act nicely to her. But I never could. I couldn’t help myself. I felt crazy- and I finally, I began to be open to the idea that I might be codependent.

I started listening to meetings, and talking to people who had recovered from codependency. I wanted what they had- freedom and peace. I worked the 12 steps with a sponsor using the AA big book, just adapted for codependency.

That was over a year ago, and since then, my thinking has changed dramatically.

My relationship with my mother is being repaired, and I have a much better relationship with my son. I’m not perfect, and I still have my moments, but I’m able to stop the obsessive thinking now with the help of my Higher Power. I’m so thankful to CoDA!

 

Carolyn L., 12/22/20

 

 

Everybody in CoDA has a story to tell. Sharing yours may help thousands of codependents still suffering. Please contribute your experience, strength and hope by emailing your story to wr@coda.org.

 

You can review previous 2015 - 2020 readings here: https://codependents.org/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/connections/ .

Older readings are here: https://coda.org/co-nnections-recovery-stories/

If you have a friend who would like to subscribe, please have them go here: https://codependents.org/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/connections/

If you have a general question about CoDA (as opposed to the specific content of this email), please email info@coda.org

If you wish more information by phone, please call (888) 444-2359 {Toll free} or (602) 277-7991.

For Spanish inquiries you may email espanol@coda.org or call (888) 444-2379 {Spanish toll free}.

  • This mailing list is a public mailing list - anyone may join or leave, at any time.
  • This mailing list is announce-only.

Each week, subscribers will automatically receive an email with a new "recovery reading". Hopefully, viewing this member created work will provide subscribers with thoughts to reflect upon during the remainder of the week.

Privacy Policy:

Per the 11th & 12th Traditions this list is private.

https://coda.org/privacy/